Take Two: A New Baby Daddy

And here we are...a mere few weeks from our next opportunity to inseminate and we have just tonight committed to a new baby daddy. Now, we need to fit buying sperm into our schedule to make sure it's done before we go on vacation (seriously...I don't want to be snowboarding down a mountain and thinking about sperm, I just don't!). We need to make sure it's here for the day o' magic (Heidi's o'vulation day...see the play on words? I crack myself up!). Anyhoo...so, we are lucky enough to have two friends, fabulous friends I might add (in case they are reading this blog) that are now pregnant (whoo-hoo!) via in-vitro. They have gone through this same process of finding a baby daddy with a different cryobank so they graciously agreed to donate all of their purchased profiles to our cause...very much appreciated!

Wait...back the truck up a little. We ended our last blog with the presumption that we were going to have to change cryobanks (sperm banks for the less inseminational information inclined) because my dear wifey is allergic to boys...or at the very least, the wash used to clean their dirty little sperm. Now, if you read back a few blogs, you'll see the adorable cowboy hat baby picture that we had settled on as our donor. We love cowboy hat baby. We want to have a cowboy hat baby. But we were in a quandary because cowboy hat baby's sperm induced violently painful reactions in Heidi's uterus and failed to fertilize. We communicated with the sperm bank to see if we could find out what they washed cowboy hat baby's sperm in and then we communicated with our fertility doctor's office to see if they could wash the sperm instead and if so, what did kind of dish soap did they use to wash it? (For the gullible (Amanda), they do not use dish soap...I'm kidding). Their active ingredient was in significantly less proportions than the bank...what? Is that a light at the end of our dark little tunnel? (Insert completely inappropriate reference here to Heidi's tunnel to her uterus...visualize with a fertility doctor looking into the tunnel with a light affixed to his head; I've seen this so it's easy to visualize). Could it be that we could use cowboy hat baby?!?! I imagine that while we were talking to the fertility doctor, there must have been that excited little tremble in our voices, like a kid on Christmas morning, about to open presents. (Insert excited giggle here.) Well, maybe! She would check with the embryologist and maybe we could. (More giggle!) Oh, one more question...do we need to worry about whether our donor is CMV positive or not? (Insert screeching halt to giggles here). Oh, yea, you do. Our donor is positive...as is 80% of the population. If Heidi is positive, no worries. But, if you've read even a small portion of our blogs, you know that Heidi doesn't follow the norm on anything...see nine follicles; see over-reaction to Clomid; see allergy to sperm...you get my point. So, back to the lab we go for more blood tests. I'm not entirely sure how little Heidi has any blood left in her little body but she did it...blood and a little tinkle (hehehe!). And yes, you guessed it...she's negative. So, once again, cowboy hat baby is out of the running.

So back to finding a new baby daddy. We spent the majority of our night yesterday reading profiles. I have to say that some of these donors are really funny; I also have to say that they aren't meaning to be funny...they just are. I suppose when you are a young, twenty-something boy, your perspective is just, well, funny. What, you say? You want examples? Why, of course, I will be happy to elaborate. When asked why he became a donor, donor number AFL9982 responded "I thought it would be a better use of it than throwing it away." Same donor in his essay explained, "I don't own an organizer, a tie or a good pair of dress shoes because the places I go let me in no matter what I'm wearing." LOL When asked who is favorite hero was, donor number BJL9999 said, "Myself". He's also an actor and a model, go figure. Donor CJL9986 cites his accomplishments as "Doing everyday things that most people can't (installing car alarm for example)." His self-description of his personality was "reserved, somewhat sarcastic; think big, but act small." What does that mean...act small??? His favorite music is any music with talented musicians...rock is best. His reason on why he became a donor, and this is my favorite quote from him, "To help people who need sperm (and the money is nice)."

We, sadly, did not select any of the above as our baby daddy. We selected a very handsome, intellectual, well-rounded, musical, creative (he loves glass blowing) donor. He was so cute, I thought maybe I wanted to date him. Heidi said she gets to date him first. Since she's using his sperm, I suppose that's only fair and right.