Sperm Learnin'

So yesterday, we took our first big step toward having a baby. No, it wasn't what you think...that won't work for us. It was our first visit to a fertility doctor. As we sat in the doctor's office, waiting for him to explain how the miracle of childbirth works without a boy, we noticed all of the picture frames decorating his office, some showing his certificates of education and qualification, but most noticeably the ones showing off the products of his work...pictures of babies, mostly twin pictures. Hhmmm, now there's something to think about.

Dr. Welden was the doctor used by lesbian friends of ours who now have two beautiful children so we knew he could help us get preggars. We sat down with Dr. Welden and did an in-depth recap of 6th grade health class with a few more details; we learned about the swimming lanes the little spermies swim in during a "traditional" insemination (you know, when a man is one of the players in this process). We learned about the menstruation cycle and how one little glitch in that cycle can throw off the whole impregnation thing. We learned how the pituitary gland can jack up a cycle. We learned all of the challenges associated with getting pregnant in a traditional situation (again, back to that boy and girl situation). We learned that it is in and of itself amazing that accidental pregnancies ever happen. Then we learned what OUR challenges would be (it goes without saying the number one challenge is that I was born without sperm).

We learned that Heidi's weight will NOT be a problem (whew!!!). Unfortunately, we also learned that her ovulatory cycle will be a bit of a problem; apparently, her pituitary gland isn't communicating with the other parts to get that whole ovulation thing going on a regular basis. But not to fear!! There are solutions to that! Rather simple solutions, even...it's called Clomid! Oh, and she has to be on birth control. Who knew that you'd need to use birth control to get pregnant? Totally contrary to all that I was ever taught about prevention of pregnancy. Maybe that's why I needed another health class recap.

So...here's the skinny on what it's going to take to knock Heidi up. First, she has to have some blood tests next week to see if she ovulated when she was supposed to. Then she starts birth control pills (still funny to me). She'll take those for about two weeks and then start peeing on ovulation sticks. When she gets a positive, we'll go into the doctor and he'll take a smidge of her uterine lining (ouch!) and test it to see exactly where she is in her ovulation cycle. Then she'll stop taking the pill and start taking Clomid.

I should state for the record here that the average woman has about a 1% chance of having multiples, i.e. twins, triplets, more... On Clomid, those percentages go up to anywhere between 7% and 10%. Seems like a lot but it's still a 90% chance that she won't have more than one little bundle of joy growing in there. But, for the record, it is a little concerning because Heidi is already super small...where the heck would she hold more than one baby?!?!

Back to the schedule...Clomid. She'll take that for two weeks. Oh, I should also note that one of the side affects to Clomid is that her PMS might be slightly worse. And by slightly, I mean, a lot. She may have to spend one week out of each month with family and friends so they can all share in this special time. :)

After the Clomid, they do some more testing and if all turns out right...we get to start that whole cycle over again, only this time, we get to inseminate when she ovulates! Dr. Welden inseminates TWICE during each ovulatory cycle so our chances of getting pregnant actually double. He guesstimates that it may take us three to four months to get pregnant.

I wonder what type of picture frame we will send to Dr. Welden as a thank you gift when this is all said and done? Will it have one baby or two? Three? Oh my!!!