The damn rabbit...

So today was day 14 and that meant pregnancy test date...we should either have a period or an embryo today. It's a big day!

Back up a day or two...so we pondered taking a test early to just "see" if we were pregnant. We did a little Internet research (sometimes the worse enemy is knowing too much, I might add) to see if the shots Heidi got, courtesy of my very skilled injection talents, would affect the test. Bad news there...the very thing we injected her with was the hormone the pregnancy test measures. So, theoretically, we could get a false positive if we tested too early because she may still have residual HCG in her system. So we pondered. And validated. And pondered. And wrestled. And...well, you get the point.

So, at approximately 4:07 a.m. on Saturday morning, Heidi had to pee. Since she wanted to test using her first morning urine, this was the time she chose to take the dead rabbit test.

What? Dead rabbit? What are you talking about, anyone under age thirty might be asking? Around 1927 it was discovered that if you injected the urine of a pregnant woman into a rabbit, there would be corpora hemorrhagica in the ovaries of the rabbit. These bulging masses on the ovaries could not be seen with out killing the rabbit to inspect the ovaries, so invariably, every rabbit died, even if the woman wasn't pregnant. The phrase, "The rabbit died," came to be a euphemism for a positive pregnancy test after the late 1920 and early 1930s. Yes, I actually had to look up this explanation to give to Heidi, hence, the "anyone under thirty" disclaimer. Anyway...

At approximately 4:10 a.m., at Heidi's urging, I got out of bed and found out that unfortunately, the rabbit had survived. Well, you say, you took it early...perhaps too early.

It was, to say the least, a very difficult weekend. It's amazing how one KNOWS that there is a small chance this will work on try #1. You are fully aware that statistically speaking, you only have a 10% to 20% chance of having this work the first time. Why should we expect that Heidi's uterus and several million strange sperm would play nice on their first encounter? (I imagine her body reacted with a stern "What the hell is that??? Hide the egg, it's going for the egg, HIDE THE EGG!!!) We knew that there was the issue with the infection in her stomach, or in her uterus, wherever it chose to infect. We knew all this, yet we still hoped. We hoped we would be the exception. We thought we would be in that 10% to 20%...I mean, those statistics have to be someone, why not us?!? Heidi learned first hand how hard it was to miss someone or something you had not yet created, but to miss the possibility of that someone. And it was hard for her. And when her heart hurts, mine hurts right along side.

So, we still had a shred of hope. Maybe we did test too early. Maybe the test on Monday would be different. It took all weekend, but Heidi had finally accepted the possibility and was ready for the result, no matter what it was. Either way, the hope was much more contained and not wholly optimistic.

This morning at approximately 6:30 a.m., the rabbit survived again. Damn rabbit.

"Like barbed wire being pulled through my stomach.."

Attention getting, isn't it? Now imagine dealing with it. That's what Heidi dealt with all last week. What started as a slight pain in her stomach last Tuesday afternoon ended up being quite excruciating for her through Thursday night. She missed two days of the Susan G. Komen 3-Day walk because of being sick.

When you are one day past day two of insemination, severe cramping in your stomach feels very ominous. Heidi could barely stand upright because of the pain. Even I am at a loss for humor when it comes to what Heidi went through. On Wednesday afternoon, we went to see Dr. Weldon to see if her pain had anything to do with the insemination.

Now, you should know that it was ridiculously difficult for me to go to work on Wednesday morning and leave her alone. Couple that with what felt like a million meetings and only short moments to call and check on her and I was feeling more than a little anxious. Thankfully, her mom offered to go and Heidi-sit until I could come home...big weight off my shoulders. At least knowing someone was there made me able to get through the rest of the day! (Not to mention, her mom also left herself logged onto Facebook on my laptop...well, let's just say all of those amazing things she had to say about me were, well, self-declared. LOL)

So, back to little Heidi and her tummy pain. We go into Dr. Welden's office, at his insistence, and the first thing he does is another ultrasound. Heidi is in a lot of pain during this process and every touch was painful for her. It takes a lot for Heidi to cry...I mean A LOT. But there she lay, on the examining table, crying. Yes, my heart was breaking for her and if I could have taken her place, every cell in my body would have jumped at the opportunity to take her out of that pain. The ultrasound showed that her ovaries were fine, her uterus appeared fine and there was only a moderate amount of extra fluid above her uterus where the follicles had recently collapsed (at least we knew she had ovulated...that was good news!).

Then blood tests. They took a lot of blood...seriously, I wonder if they know that she's only about 12 lbs., she doesn't have much of anything to spare! Blood tests to be back the next day and we'd figure out next steps. He gave her a prescription for an antibiotic just in case it was an infection; he wanted her to already begin the regimen. He advised it was safe for her even if she was pregnant. If you don't know Heidi, she's a little, well, what's the word? Stubborn. She is incredibly stubborn (you'd think she was the Leo, not me). She was very concerned about taking the antibiotic in case she was pregnant. It took a lot of convincing to get her to agree to take it but she finally relented. We also picked up some gas pills in case this whole thing just turned out being one big, painful, expensive...um, butt burp. She took the gas pills, the fast acting kind, and nothing. The pain was still there. She took the antibiotic too. The next day, Thursday, she was in the same amount of pain all day. When I came home, she was up and about; actually standing upright. That was progress! We were due to leave very early the next morning for the 3-day and we spent time discussing whether or not we would participate...I was NOT going to leave her alone for three days. Wasn't going to happen, no way, no day!

Long story, well, kind of long, she felt well enough to go to opening ceremonies on Friday and came to a cheering station with her mom. Saturday, she felt well enough to come to lunch and be a "walker stalker" for awhile. Sunday, she walked with us! She's still on her antibiotic, but feeling much better.

As an aside, the doctor gave her another antibiotic to take with her current one, but the first line in the instructions said not to take it if you are in your first three months of pregnancy. There was no convincing her on this one. I guess I just have to be happy she agreed to one regimen...I'm incredibly happy she's feeling better. Now, we just have a waiting game....

Monday is pregnancy test time. We have three tests to be sure. Cross your fingers! And your eyes, maybe even your toes...